Marcia Jemma Didier has been spending the last few days doting on her two new grandchildren, who were born two days apart, on October 14 and 16–something she was unable to do with another grandchild who was born in 2010 following her breast cancer diagnosis.
“I was diagnosed in early March (2010), and my treatment lasted from then to the end of the year. My grandson was born on September 16, and I couldn’t go near him. I was so sad because I wanted to hold him so badly,” Didier told WE magazine.
But barring that, she said, thankfully, her experience with the disease was not as bad as the horror stories she had heard from others who have walked that same road.
“My children were crying, and my mom, bless her soul, broke down when we got the news. The only time I cried was when my hair started to fall out. But then I would remember seeing children with cancer in the hospitals on TV, with no hair, and they would be smiling. And I told myself, ‘If they could be so courageous, you could too.’”
The Malabar, Arima resident credits the spiritual foundation her late mother instilled in her for giving her the strength to fight and believes she is alive today because her cancer was detected early.
“I always go for my checkups, mammograms, and pap smears. The doctors at the Arima hospital found a lump in my right breast and sent me to Mt Hope for a biopsy.” At Stage 1, the cancer was still contained in the lump, and she was advised to do a mastectomy.
“I didn’t feel fear. Maybe it was because, coming from a spiritual background, I had the strength to listen to what the doctors were saying and to move quickly.”
She was 49 at the time, and she said that because she had already had her five children and had no husband, having to remove the breast did not bother her.
“And even if someone comes into my life now, they have to love me as I am because I love me, and my God loves me as I am.
“Ladies, that’s what we should be doing: listening to those who know (doctors) and believing and trusting God.”
After the surgery at the Eric Williams Medical Sciences Complex, she underwent six rounds of chemo and 24 sessions of radiation at the St James Medical Complex, with her children and good friends supporting her every step of the way.
“Support is nice to have when you’re going through this because chemo makes you so weak, exhausted, and sleepy. Although I didn’t have too many bad experiences, I still needed the support.”
Today, Didier is in a healthy physical, mental and emotional state, maintains a balanced diet, has no cancer, and consistently attends her annual screening appointments. Although she said she was not exactly fearful that the cancer will return, she admitted that sometimes she does think about it.
“I know people who have had a rough time with it; some of them have passed on. And I don’t ever want to have to go through chemo again, so having the cancer come back will cross my mind sometimes, but I don’t dwell on it. With this journey, you cannot listen to negative people. I don’t entertain them. I tell them, ‘When God is ready for me, he will take me.’”
The after-effects of the cancer treatment and a spinal injury she sustained from a fall many years ago have left Didier unable to work and dependent on a disability grant that doesn’t go too far. Despite this, though, she tries to find the silver lining in the hand she has been dealt.
“Removal of the lymph nodes from my arm left me with a heaviness and numbness in the arm, and there are times it still feels tender. The work I used to do required lifting, so I can’t do that anymore.”
But instead of dwelling on what could and should have been, Didier uses the time to enjoy her children, grandchildren, and the life that she has. For the way she sees it, things could have turned out much worse for her.
“Ladies, we need to start to think positive, because negative thinking causes stress … And remember to do your screening and your home checks, because in a split second things can change.”
