I now feel like a bird without a nest. Like a tree without a mountain. Like Road Runner without Wily E Coyote.
The bluebird of happiness that once chirped on my windowsill has been replaced by the corbeau of choleric.
She's gone. This time, for real. Yeah, I know she had been hinting that it was time to move on, but I didn't take her seriously. After all, God created editors because mothers couldn't be everywhere.
Editors are supposed to be tireless and long-suffering and possessed of infinite patience and wisdom. They are supposed to always be. There–where we can ignore them most of the time but hang on to their shoulders when we are in trouble.
The Thing is this: Ms Judy Raymond is leaving her post as editor-in-chief of the Guardian. A newspaper editor is part parent, part captain; part friend, part dragon. Good editors inspire and motivate; and give us a good pummelling when need be. They also forgive, and can help us find the best in ourselves. It's an impossible job, really, but being the editor of a daily newspaper is still a priceless experience.
Behind her chair in her office hung a giant red poster which read: "Keep Calm and Carry On.''
Ms Raymond presided over the Guardian newsroom from 2012 with style and aplomb. That's the thing about Judy–she could remain unflappable (and funny!) during a hurricane or Black Friday sale. For people who prefer throwing stuff rather than glueing pieces of a disaster back together, she could be exasperatingly even-tempered.
I thank her for giving me an irreverent voice every Monday–the first ever opinionista to have a weekly column. More importantly, she also gave space and support to everyday hero Debbie Jacob, who recounted the survival stories of the boys whom Debbie taught English at the Youth Training Centre. The stories eventually grew into the book Wishing for Wings. Judy did lots of other cool things but if I go on this will become mawkish.
I could tell you about her great shoe collection, and refrigerator-painting skills but I crown her with laurels for being the undisputed Punctuation Queen.
She is like my own personal Raymond's Dictionary of Modern English Usage.
E-mail her a question about dummy subjects and the subjunctive tense and, hey presto, she replies immediately with a tutorial. She has been trying to teach me the difference between an em-dash and an en-dash but I am unable to muster any enthusiasm for the topic–at all.
Her affection for correct punctuation, spelling and grammar might have something to do with her study of Latin and Greek at Oxford University, in England. But I rather think she would have been a grammar czar no matter where or what she studied, for the same reason she never has chipped nail polish, can cook desserts, and appreciates the value of polka dots.
Her mind craves excellence and is like a sparkling window which lets in the light and also opens out to the world. A woman like that can't help but hum along to the rhythm of a perfect sentence.
I considered writing this column in mash-up English, in reverse honour of Judy's skills, kind of like Leela, in the Mystic Masseur, who knew plenty punctuation marks and sprinkled: them; everywhere! Like; black pepper. But then, the shock might have been too much for my guru of grammar.
Dear Judy, please finish that book you have been working on, about 19th-century artist Richard Bridgens. Then write some more. And more. Such talent should not be shut up in an office. And, whatever else you do, be happy–with an exclamation point!