The Christmas sugar rush is over. As 2017 rolls in tonight, put down the glass of Scotch/Coke Zero and accept another bite.
2016, we all know, was Annus Horribilis. But 2017, (you hope) will be that much better for business.
Yeah right. (Ancel Roget might sniff.)
Queen Elizabeth probably dissed 1992 as an "Annus Horribilis" because one part of that term may have sounded like how she really felt about 1992–and Latin was the best way to say it politely.
So shelve the subtlety about the year gone by. Or the one to come.
And let us pray:
God above (and all below), strike the hearts and sway the minds of Cousin Ancel and the politicos this weekend, so next week we won't be trudging 10 miles to work, dragging the two little ones along.
Allah, the most merciful, spare us any more jokes from Colm. O-0-0 of that is as much as we can take. And OWTU, too, has had it uptohere.
Lord, prevail on the Powers-That-Be and Those-That-Wannabe, to sail straight, for T&T's sake. Get that moral compass ticking and right the ship. Not everybody could swim, people.
Teach them the gospel according to protocol maven Lenore Dorset–that plain talk doesn't always involve bad manners. And walkouts do not a "move" make.
Great Spirit, Wakan Tanka, help them find a way to FATCA. Entreat all to meet midway and start 2017 on the right foot. Not out of synch. As usual.
Susamachar members, pray for FATCA in case it reaches to Uncle Trump halting on-line transactions. Because there goes Colm's projected on-line tax revenue. All $70m of it.
Come to T&T's aid, great Ganesha, cause the economy and murder rate to trade places. Let the economy shoot up 452 per cent. Let murders decline by same.
Jesus Malverde, lead bandits to see the way, the truth and the light. If not, the only way they might begin to see the truth is when the police helicopter's spotlight finds them. And end up, Losers of the Year for a 14th stretch.
Confer the grace of appointment upon a Commissioner of Police (CoP). Gift them with better luck than the other CoP.
Grant their charges the understanding that after blowing $20.8 billion on police in the last 10 years, citizens want action on crime! Not just in movies.
Also, that "posing" is for Victoria's Secret 2017 calendar girls and others wishing to protect and serve themselves. Not those paid to protect and serve J Public.
St Michael, bless the many good police officers (you know who u r) and inspire the rest to do better (not just in running the "block.")
St Expedite, imbue Imbert with information to make 2017 so bright, we all gotta wear shades and Ravi B's "Budget" will just be another great tune. Not a reality of life.
Lighten Colm's burden–but not by shifting everything to a Young man.
Let T&T not need Jude Thaddeus or Rita Caskia. Tho' most everybody already lose the patience of Job (ask Ancel).
St Isidore, aid true believers who know agriculture (and chocolate production) is the future and the energy sector is so much hot air. Especially when you rely on Venezuela for gas and the Guardia Nacional fixes prices.
Grant us clarity of vision to accept a "hoe" isn't necessarily a bad thing and might actually be instrumental toward a (legally) viable (daytime) business that stands financially upright (not just horizontal).
St Matthew, pry Imbert's clutch off your arm and drop lightning bolts on greedy businesses keeping J Public in thrall, importing cheaply and selling costly, rather than properly investing, homeground.
Light a Trinity Cathedral candle for those leading T&T into temptation. But forgive their trespasses because Guide Dogs are always available for the blind. If not–court and Crime Watch on standby.
Connect the head and heart chakras of companies whose grey matter is taxed by mismanagement leaving them in the red, making futures black and causing pink slip confusion. Open their eyes to the truth that clumsy, dated solutions–while facilitating corporate in-house "cool"–makes one's public face look like so much poo.
St Hubert, discourage financial planners from employing the mathematical brinksmanship of taxi drivers who tell you "One to Go!" Until you find, "Drive" really needs four more to fill the vehicle.
Gaea, sway Sandals to keep Tobago green, serene and clean as it boasts of (and is battling to maintain.)Good luck, St Joseph with those 2,056+ novenas from workers which hit you in 2016. File alongside the 800 already received ahead of 2017.
So: blow the Old Year's steam out with as big a bang as Maxie Cuffie's Fireworks Police allow and pray to recover tomorrow morning–all in one piece, holding it together for 2017!