The March 2010 issue of the Caribbean Medical Journal carried an article on communication behaviour, intended mainly for the medical personnel. The article reminds these professionals that it is "not only expertise, knowledge and technical competence" that are important, "the vital ingredient is good communication." Like all skills, this has to be acquired through hard work, experience and application. What an excellent reminder for practitioners in every field! We can be academically brilliant and technically competent, but sub-standard in relationships at our workplaces. Our patterns of behaviour and speech can repel and discourage, rather than inspire and edify.
Some of us at formal meetings can be discourteous and sharp-tongued, unwilling to consider different viewpoints. We hear people who express disappointment about communication within the church fellowship, and perhaps we know of persons who lost their love for regular worship with fellow-believers because some person did not control or guard the tongue. In his mission to the early congregations Paul had to deal with those who thought they had better gifts from God, and were reluctant to live in harmony and peace with those who disagreed with them. "Do not think you know it all." he wrote to the Romans. (Romans 12:16) As the article in the Medical Journal states, good communication skills require "hand work, experience and application." We are not expected to be silent when correction is necessary, or to refrain from defending our viewpoint if we are convinced it is positively helpful to do so.
What we are expected to do is to speak with humility and not arrogance in a spirit of peace, not offensive pride.
There are many verses in the Bible with warnings and admonitions about the use of words. The Book of Proverbs contains many such verses, for example, "From a wise man comes wise speech; the words of the wise are persuasive. Kind words are like honey-sweet to the soul. And healthy for the body." (Proverbs 16:23, 24) "Patience can persuade a prince, and soft speech can break bones." (Proverbs 25:15) "Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves. Ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice." (Proverbs 31:9) In the New Testament Paul advises the Ephesians, "Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." (Ephesians 4:29) In the letter of James, all of Chapter 3 is devoted to "controlling the tongue" and God's kind of wisdom. So whether we are conversing with an individual, addressing a gathering or a congregation we need to remember the vital ingredient-good communication.