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Honouring the past at your wedding
Published:
Sunday, June 24, 2012
Recently, I read about a themed wedding, where a bride used the motif of her mother’s pendant on her invitations, programme and even on her dance floor. She inherited the necklace with the pendant when her mother passed away and wanted to incorporate her mother into her wedding even though she wasn’t there physically. The bride was quoted as saying, “You can imagine how powerful it was for us to have that symbol of her love surrounding and supporting our union.” If you’ve lost someone close to you, remember that although weddings signal a new beginning for you and your fiancé(e), celebrating your past can be a meaningful way to personalise your reception and ceremony. The key to creating long-lasting memories for both you and your guests is to incorporate personal flair, cues and symbols that reflect your love and history.
Here are some suggestions for couples who want to honour their past or re-kindle family traditions and customs at their wedding:
• Dance your first dance to the same song that was your grandparents’ or parents’ first dance song.
• Print a programme for your guests. This allows you to explain the significance of rites and rituals from your ceremony and make special mention of those who have passed. You could also include a brief summary of how you met or a message of appreciation to your guests. You can even incorporate quotations from love songs or religious books that you both like.
• Honour and remember deceased relatives by lighting a candle or incense in their memory, ringing a bell, saying a prayer or placing a flower on an empty seat or near a framed photo.
• Celebrate your heritage by incorporating some of your cultural ancestry and traditions into the ceremony. Look for ways to combine traditional wedding elements with the non-traditional, for example a sand ceremony or “jumping the broom.”
• If you have children with your partner or children from a previous marriage, include them in the ceremony by asking them to light a family candle, do a reading, sing a song or release helium balloons, bubbles, confetti, white doves or butterflies after the exchange of rings.
• Wear an heirloom piece that has special significance to your family or your partner’s family eg attire or jewelry. Or you can use an heirloom in a place of prominence at your ceremony eg the unity candle set that belonged to your parents or your parents’ toasting wine glasses.
• Attach a locket which holds a photo of your beloved to your bridal bouquet with a ribbon.
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