Indi Ramjeet
Student, Tunapuna Boys, Level 3
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For as long as I can remember, I was a scared, frail little girl, growing up feeling sadness.
As I awoke on mornings my little heart would beat, afraid of what, I don't know. All I knew is I wasn't going to be there when she needed something. Off I would go, wondering and hoping that time of day would come, soon.
Late again, another day of hurt and embarrassment, as I cross the gate, they all stared and laughed at me. Late line for you, late comer; soon, the teacher said, homework on the desk.
I would be afraid to pull out my book from my unzipped bag. I had no homework, for I had to give all my attention to my sick and terminally ill mother. Even though there were good times when I had done my homework, when she was well enough, she would show and teach me, being the well-educated person that she was.
My father tried everything to save her, working two jobs to make ends meet. My brothers and sisters lashed out and grieved in their own way.
My struggle in school, with having problems to read was very challenging for me but, that didn't stop the children from making fun of me. When I had to stand in front the entire class to read a book or solve a problem on the board, I felt as though I was in a deep, dark hole, screaming for the torment to just go away.
As the terms went by, the teachers would just pass me on to the next class, knowing very well that I had difficulties reading. As the years passed, my mother passed away. Soon after, I wrote Common Entrance and failed.
Hurt as I was, I dropped out of school and started working at the tender age of fourteen. Working in a world I knew nothing about was terrifying enough.
Being afraid of what people would think, knowing I couldn't read and spell correctly; but, I kept the words of my mother in my head, have faith in yourself and success will be yours.
A close friend of my mother soon became my guardian mother. We became very close, all my trials and happiness would fall to her ears. She had faith and hope in me.
The day came when I was confronted by my fear. A customer asked if I could read the ingredients on a product because she forgot her spectacles. I started with the little confidence I had, reading, fumbling and struggling with each word.
She said softly, if only I had my glasses. I felt so embarrassed. I knew right there and then something had to be done. I can't feel this way every time I was confronted with a situation like this. I knew I could be better. I wanted to be able in the future to read a bedtime story or help my children with their homework.
I signed up for classes, but, in life we have to expect the unexpected. Challenges arise and the realities of life kick in. In order to survive you have to work. Shortly after I got married, I had the support of my husband to further my schooling. I am currently attending Alta classes and I am determined to read and spell properly, doing it with confidence. I know I will succeed!
Play your part to build literacy. If you have time, volunteer to be an Alta tutor, a Reading Circle guide or to assist students on the computer. If your time is already booked, sponsor an Alta student for the year (TT$500). Call 624-ALTA (2582) or e-mail altatt@yahoo.com.