During Saturday’s Media Association talk, I posted a particularly provocative statement by Ria Mohammed-Davidson about the thorny issues that surround the pending passage into law of the remaining...
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How we can get the best from our kids
“I have seen and experienced first-hand, the negative results of mistakes that we all make as parents. Show me a parent who has not made mistakes in this challenging and overwhelming process and we would all be looking at the person who has done what no man or woman has done before”
Very soon, a new school year will be upon us. This is inevitable, parents, and so, we need to once again gather our courage, put the memories of the long vacation period behind us, and move forward with the determination to help our children do the best that they can. Still, we want to achieve peace, harmony and happiness which are all necessary if we are to secure the best from our live-in students. There is a lot that we can do to help the process of success.
Things we did last school year that we don’t want to do this school year
If you are guilty of quarreling a lot more than you should, then you probably want to at least decrease this. A good way to find out if you did is to ask your kids how you rated on the “quarrel” scale which ranges from zero to ten. If you score zero, then you need to re-examine because your kids are probably very afraid to tell you the truth or perhaps, you have found a recipe that you can sell to the rest of us.
If you scored somewhere between one to four, congratulations are in order. You may be just quite normal like the rest of us. However, if you scored five or more, you are entering the “danger” zone and you need to curb this pattern before you become a “10.” If you become a ten, trust me, no one will want to be around you and this, you do not want to happen. Seriously, parents, our children cannot stand it when we constantly quarrel. If you don’t believe me, ask your children. Do ask in a non-threatening way so that they will risk telling you the truth. Now, once you are told, please strive not to be angry; also, nothing is wrong with letting them know that you are sorry and will try to do better. Remember to point out though that they can help you by following the house rules so that you don’t have to ask twice and three times for co-operation that they should automatically give. Yes, most times “quarreling” is a two-way or three-way street and all family members may need to chip in to help the “quarreling” parent. Believe me, the efforts will be worth it so that peace and tranquility can prevail and students can enjoy the learning process which must begin at home.
Dad, this one is for you
If you were not as supportive as you should have been last school year, is it any wonder that your kids did not do as well as you hoped? Or, do you even know how they did? Are you in touch at all with anything that’s going on in your house or do you just connect with family members when you have something negative or sarcastic to say?
If you were a great Dad last school year, I am very glad for your partner and your children, because Dad, we all need you in order to do really well. There is so much that you can do to help. Like what, you ask? If you want the best answer you really need to check with family members, that is, if you are really serious about making a difference in your children’s lives and helping them to do really well. However, I can suggest that you just really need to get involved. You would find that you may be presently excluded from a lot of family fun through your own unconscious lack of connection with your family.
Find ways to get involved today. Start with really simple things like packing lunch boxes or put out uniforms for the next morning or help to plan menus for next day or the next week. How about just plain giving some more time to all family members this school year? You may be very surprised at the improved academic success of your own children if you do decide to be more actively involved in their lives. Put them into you schedule, Dad, and they will never forget the “things that Dad did” to contribute to their success at school.