Last night I found myself on a thread where women of darker skinned tones were accusing girls of mixed race or lighter skinned tones of being privileged.
This conversation took me back to an article I wrote during the US election while watching blacks spew hate towards white but justified it because they mattered just as much, and it was done to them for generations so now they get to do it too. My challenge with this entire issue is the further divide it causes.
Schools take in blacks because they have a quota to fill. Magazines must put their token black woman because we have a quota to fill. And in the meantime, those so-called mixed girls are at the raw end of the deal and it's justified because they had the privilege for so many years, so now we will turn them into the victims so that we can have our time to shine.
Can't we change the conversation to one where we genuinely celebrate each race and colour? Shouldn't our efforts be on finding a way to reprogramme the mind without tearing down another colour?
When men jump up and say they are victims too, feminists rightly say that it's simply not relevant in the conversation. What men endure is a separate conversation and shouldn't be used to minimise what women endure. Similarly, while we advocate for women carrying about themselves in an appropriate manner, we cannot place inappropriate dress and behaviour in the same conversation as rape.
When we add white privilege or mixed-race privilege to the topic of black beauty we dilute the cause and simply add to the racial conversation, with just another flavour really.
If we want our sons to see beauty in every colour, race or shape, then comment on everyone positively. When they are asleep print pictures of models in every form and fashion and create your own magazine and have fun turning the pages. If your son is drawn to a particular type, please don't tell him he's wrong. Be firm in your preference. Be deliberate to point out the gorgeous black girl walking down the road (without saying she is gorgeous for a black girl). Just point out beauty without using any adjectives that describe their race, their colour, their hair or their shape.
Just point out their beauty. I firmly believe if we became intentional about pointing out and looking for the beauty in everyone, then the racial divide will end while simultaneously rewiring the minds of what the next generation views as pretty.
Just celebrate, just celebrate, just celebrate. Avoid anything that further divides.