Transitions move us from one place to another, whether we are changing our mindsets, perspectives, image, actions, habits, careers, relationships or dreams. Sometimes, a crisis throws us into a transition. Even if we kick and scream, we have no choice but to ride it out, until we reach a destination that feels steady and secure. Other times, we choose to wade through a transition for personal or professional reasons. At first, we may be very excited to explore the possibilities at the end of the transition. Yet, as we venture further along, the unforeseen realities of daily adjustments surface, we encounter periods of uncertainty, fears arise, the feeling of living between lives overwhelm us and we lose our focus. It's easy to buckle under the discomfort, especially when our critical inner voices imply that we have made a mistake or that we don't have what it takes to find our way through. Moreover, the people who once endorsed our transition begin to feel the effects of our turmoil and their support may falter. So, we convince ourselves that our only recourse is to trade our goals for instant relief from the uneasiness. However, if we let the voices of uncertainty, fear and instability speak too loudly, we will make decisions about our future that may not serve us well in the end.
To navigate through any transition successfully, we should: • Reaffirm why we are in transition. It is inevitable, that somewhere along the path of our transition, we will grow weary, feel uncertain and contemplate reverting to our old lives. Reaffirming the reason we embarked on our particular transition and our commitment to complete it, is a powerful motivator.
• Consume information about the process of our peculiar transition. If, "Knowledge is power" - a saying usually attributed to the philosopher, Sir Francis Bacon, we should familiarise ourselves with the "what" and "how" that inform, encourage and empower us. When we know the intricacies of a life transition and the best way to begin, proceed and succeed, we are better prepared to balance the harsh realities of our transition, with the vision we have of our destination.
•Confront our apprehensions. Allowing our apprehensions to hang around and torment us is tantamount to giving them permission for a sustained assault on our minds and emotions. We should call them out and thwart their attempts to trip us up and stop us. Then, we should use the mental and emotional space for positive thoughts that drive us forward.
•Implement strategies to steady our self-doubt. A transition is more manageable when we dig into our cache of strengths, skills, experiences and accomplishments. They are effective ammunition against the clamour of our self-doubt.
•Stabilise our relationships. Often, caring and supportive relationships constitute the anchor that keeps us steady amidst the challenges of a transition. The painful reality is that not all relationships can survive the displacement, shared allegiances and changing emotions. Moreover, when they fall apart under the strain, our transition becomes more difficult. Even those that survive buckle periodically. Therefore, as we battle with the issues in our transition, we must pay attention to our relationships. We should move quickly to stabilise them - assessing the damage, filling in the cracks, reinforcing the weak areas and building up where they are strong.
•It takes a leap of faith to step into a transition and determination to wade through it. If you have sound knowledge, strong relationships and smart strategies to deal with the inevitable fear, uncertainty and self-doubt, you will make your way through and emerge to claim the prize at the end.