With music lovers still aching over the loss of one of its greats, Whitney Houston, the airwaves are humming with her stirring melodies. And while "The Greatest Love of All" certainly wasn't exclusively hers, it's a song that will forever be associated with her. "Learning to love yourself," she sang, "is the greatest love of all." Self-love...what does it really mean? We know it isn't synonymous with selfishness or greed. We know it doesn't mean rising to the top without a care for the others we clamber over. We know more about what it ISN'T than what it is. How do you love yourself? Here are a few ideas. Appreciate your own company. We love our family and our friends, and in some ways, we can measure our wealth and good fortune by how many we have of both, but sometimes we need reminding that we can be our own good company. Some of us can barely squeeze in ten minutes for a soak in the bath, and that's fine.
For others, an afternoon of solitude, without even the distractions of a book or movie, can do wonders to soothe the soul and get us back in touch with the sound of our own heartbeat. And for the lucky few who can manage a weekend retreat, a solitary walk, or sunup-to-sundown away from it all....ah, bliss. Learn a new skill. You stand there admiring a painting, but have you ever picked up a brush? You can't get enough of your favourite author, but when last did you commit your thoughts to paper? Who me, you say? Yes, you. Learn to do something you never thought you'd be good at. You'll be surprised when you discover a new aptitude. And the great thing about the electronic age is that often you don't have to leave your house to take a class (except maybe for hang-gliding). Your next teacher might be just a few clicks away. Cut out the mauvais-langue. You've probably never been as mean, sarcastic and insulting to another human being as you routinely are to yourself. "I suck at this." "I hate myself when...." "I look terrible!". Don't you think you beat yourself up enough? Replace negative self-chat with a sweet, sincere compliment every once in a while. It will do you a world of good. Feed yourself better. You wouldn't give your dog half the garbage you put into your mouth: pesticide-laden, artificially grown, sugar-loaded, over-processed....ick, ick, and ick!
Treat yourself to a detox weekend, eating only fresh, natural products. Try to hang on to at least one healthy habit you picked up. Feel your body say, aahh! Pack yourself off to bed early. Once in a while, forget the late night movie, put down the book, make your excuses to lovers, family, friends, and anyone else who might be encouraging you to stay up late. Exchange it for this revolutionary technique: Step one: dive under the covers. Step two: stay there. Stop yearning for the neighbour's green grass. Don't envy what others own or what they have achieved. You don't know what they did to get there. Besides, they're them and you're you. Look down at your own feet and admire the lovely green grass growing under them. Then mow the lawn...kidding! Clean up as if you're expecting company. Okay, maybe this one involves hard work, but why does your house only get spiffied up when someone's coming over?
Even if it's just for a few hours, declare war on dirt, murder a few dust bunnies, and put some flowers on the table. Then lay out a dinner treat for your most important dinner guest: you. Smile more. When you smile, your brain releases happy hormones that make you feel better, even if you have nothing to smile about. It's a simple equation; those who smile more live happier lives. Yeah, it's that easy. Forgive yourself. The Lord Himself promised to forgive us as we forgive others, but as hard as it is sometimes to forgive others for their wrongdoings, it's doubly difficult to let go of our own sins. Instead, we chew on them like yesterday's gum, even though it's hard, bitter and tasteless. Spit it out fast, before you choke on it. Love someone else. Love is the world's greatest perpetual motion machine. It bounces endlessly back and forth between you and everyone else. It slows down sometimes, and speeds up others, but it's always moving. Give love, radiate it, pass it on unselfishly, and it will always, always, come back to you.
