Sim­ple Tips on how to spice up your love life and re­vamp the pas­sion in your mar­riage.

If I told you how many cou­ples suf­fer in the bed­room on a dai­ly ba­sis, the sta­tis­tics would seem ab­solute­ly alarm­ing and mind-blow­ing. There are many fac­tors that con­tribute to this dis­con­nect be­tween love and sex but thank­ful­ly, with the right mind­set and at­ten­tion, things can im­prove with ef­fort and time. If you love your part­ner but the sex­u­al chem­istry is dwin­dling, don’t give up and be neg­a­tive, in­stead, think of it as a new chal­lenge and op­por­tu­ni­ty to broad­en your hori­zons in­ti­mate­ly.

In re­la­tion­ships, time can work for you or work against you. The re­al skill is know­ing what to use to your ad­van­tage and how to do so. If you are in a long-term re­la­tion­ship with your part­ner, you know the most in­ti­mate of de­tails, their likes and dis­likes, their sex­u­al moods and in­hi­bi­tions. Think well about what turns him or her on and the con­nec­tion you both built at the be­gin­ning of the re­la­tion­ship. Is there a pat­tern now? Are things bor­ing? Are both of you still giv­ing the same ef­fort as be­fore?

A re­la­tion­ship, es­pe­cial­ly a mar­riage is just like a car or a house, it re­quires main­te­nance and con­sis­tent check-ups and up­grades. Fore­play starts long be­fore you even en­ter a bed­room (for both men and women). Do not treat your part­ner bad­ly and ex­pect to reap re­wards sex­u­al­ly. Com­mu­ni­cate with your spe­cial some­one and deal with the is­sues out of the bed­room and with­in the heart first, be­fore any­thing else, and trust me the bed­room woes will lessen.

If things are good in every av­enue ex­cept sex­u­al­ly, it is less com­pli­cat­ed to spice up. Some­times cou­ples just need to step out of their com­fort zone and busy sched­ules for changes to be made. For in­stance, a man can send flow­ers to his wife/girl­friend with a sug­ges­tive note or leave a nice pack­age of some hand­picked lin­gerie, wrapped, on the bed at home. That is sure to build ex­cite­ment and an­tic­i­pa­tion for both par­ties.

The el­e­ment of sur­prise is un­matched. It’s all about break­ing the norm and act­ing like you are in­to the mo­ment and can’t wait a sec­ond longer. Some mar­ried cou­ples com­plain about sex be­ing like a job and al­most make it seem tax­ing and tir­ing. If this is the cause and you’ve had a long day, mas­ter the art of the quick­ie but in a way that will seem ap­peal­ing and feisty.

An­oth­er way to add a lit­tle heat to the mix is act­ing out your fan­tasies us­ing meth­ods such as role play or sim­ply send­ing cute, sexy mes­sages to each oth­er dur­ing the day stat­ing how much you love the oth­er per­son and de­tails of your in­ti­mate plans for lat­er. It may seem cheesy but these are the small ges­tures that keep the siz­zle in a re­la­tion­ship. Blind­folds and games are avail­able every­where, use an ar­ti­cle of cloth­ing to cov­er his/her eyes and tease the sens­es. When one sense is lim­it­ed, the oth­ers are height­ened and add an­oth­er lev­el of ex­cite­ment. Ex­plore these con­cepts and ed­u­cate your­self. Life is too short to stay in the box and be shy with the per­son you in­tend to spend the rest of your life.

To be quite frank, you can try every­thing un­der the sun be­cause there are many ways to ex­plore sex­u­al­i­ty but the most im­por­tant ac­tion is sim­ply telling the oth­er per­son that you love them every­day with pas­sion, cer­tain­ty and ex­cite­ment in your voice. For most peo­ple, that is the biggest and most in­ti­mate turn-on in the book. Nev­er ne­glect it, be­cause sex, re­gard­less of how ca­su­al so­ci­ety treats it to­day, is meant to be a spe­cial and mean­ing­ful bond­ing ex­pe­ri­ence be­tween peo­ple in a union in­clu­sive of love, treat it as such.