Discover how to wish them the best and move on with your life with a positive frame of mind and a contented heart.
Pain. There are many types of pain and this topic is the definition of pure emotional torture - Unrequited love. It happens all the time and I have been on both sides of the situation, so trust me when I say it is not an easy journey and not everyone will be able to move on with grace, understanding and class but it is worth every bit of the eventual contentment and happiness that will be brought to your heart.
So the person you love, loves someone else and it feels like the universe has cracked open along with your heart at the centre of it. It feels like an ongoing emotion of dismal depression and sadness no matter how you try to distract yourself. Regardless of your particular experience, this is for every one of you - whether it is about the guy or girl that does not even know you exist, the friend that simply does not have romantic intentions for you, the relationship you are in at the moment but are constantly compared to an “oh so perfect ex” or the ex that has moved on with someone new and you are still deeply in love with him/her.
Last week, my friend called me in tears because her ex boyfriend got married and she on the other hand, is still single. I felt her pain and as we talked, I realised the marriage brought out so many issues within herself, most having to do with her own internal feelings and struggles. I had to remind her why they broke up and why the relationship didn’t work after numerous attempts. I reassured her that even if the love was there, she should be happy that HE is now genuinely in a happier situation. It’s the right way to think.
Being happy for others by using positive thinking allows us to see the story from all sides and different perspectives. It removes hate and malice from our thoughts and releases those bitter critters that whisper into our ear from time to time, encouraging jealousy and envy. Negative thinking on the flip side, explains why people bad talk their ex after a break up. It also explains why an individual, after being rejected by someone, usually finds faults with the person - to make themselves feel better.
All of us need to adapt a positive way of thinking when we see that someone has made the decision to pursue love elsewhere. Do not make trouble in the relationships of others because of your own selfish needs. Love is not selfish, even if it is unrequited. Wish them the best and move forward with a lighter heart than yesterday. Remembering the reasons why your relationship with that person did not work, will help you to move forward gracefully. Besides, why would you want to be with someone who does not want to be with you? Don’t you deserve to be loved in return and not fight for affection? I understand the heart wants what it wants, Selena Gomez sang an entire song to express that notion but really, when are you going to give your heart what it NEEDS?
Today, put your energy into loving your own heart in a selfless way. Think about your needs instead of your wants and desires, when you focus on that, everything else will fall into place with time. God has got your back and his plan is always better than what we set out for ourselves. That perfect someone you are pining for, cannot be all that perfect if he/she does not see how amazing and special you are. Wait for the one who will express his/her passion to love you in ways you have never experienced. Be thankful for the feeling of love your ex once gave your heart and let go to make room for what can be a greater love. Life goes on and things happen, our character is defined by how we deal with the punches and rebuild ourselves. Are you going to be a victim of sadness or lead yourself into a new chapter of faith, contentment and peace of heart and mind? The decision is yours.